How Your People-Pleasing Leadership Style Increases Turnover and How to Change It

A 4 min read.

During last week’s Hospitality Leadership Summit, we delved into the Saboteurs that hinder our path to becoming more successful leaders. One prevalent Saboteur that continually emerges, especially within the hospitality industry, is the "people-pleaser."

(When you are interested in learning more about what’s holding you back from being more successful and happy, let’s connect).

People-pleasing leaders often seek acceptance and approval by constantly assisting, pleasing, or complimenting others. They genuinely believe that putting others' needs ahead of their own is the mark of being a good person. Unfortunately, this approach frequently leads to feelings of resentment as they sense they're being taken advantage of.

I've often faced challenges when managing people-pleasers. While their teams tend to be content, they often the lack the number of high-performing individuals they could have due to lack of coaching. I've observed that some of the people-pleasers I've supervised prioritize being the nice manager rather holding their team members accountable. Consequently, this dynamic has strained our professional relationships.

Reach out for more of an indepth conversation on how to support and motivate the people pleasers in your organization.

(Speaking managers, if you are looking for great managers to add to your team and tired of spending time and energy searching, Willow Tree Recruiting can connect you with the leaders you need).

Within our business, there is ample room for improvement, but these managers hesitate to provide coaching or implement new systems when they feel it might discomfort their teams. Their fear of jeopardizing their relationships with their team members often holds them back from embracing necessary changes.

Reflecting on the past, I find myself yearning for the tools and knowledge I possess today. If only I had access to these resources back then, I could have supported those managers in recognizing the detrimental effects of their leadership styles on both the business and their teams. I would have been able to offer valuable guidance on how to make necessary adjustments, thereby setting them on a path toward future success.

In this blog, we will explore the detrimental impacts of a people-pleasing leadership style within the restaurant business. From high employee turnover to burnout, we'll shed light on how this approach can ultimately drain your business's resources and hinder its success.

Here are several ways in which prioritizing others' needs at the expense of your own can have adverse effects on your business:

Reduced Accountability for Leadership

In a people-pleasing leadership environment, leaders may avoid making tough decisions or implementing necessary changes to improve the restaurant's operations. This can result in stagnation and a resistance to change, which can negatively impact the restaurant's competitiveness and profitability. Employees can become frustrated with the lack of problem solving and look for other jobs.

The High Cost of Turnover

Employees who work for people pleasers can become dependent on the leaders, which causes the leader to burnout. Employee turnover in the restaurant industry is notoriously expensive. It includes recruitment costs, training expenses, and the loss of productivity during the transition period when new hires are brought up to speed. A high turnover rate also contributes to a less experienced staff, potentially leading to a decrease in the quality of service and customer satisfaction.

Loss of Institutional Knowledge

High employee turnover means losing experienced and knowledgeable staff members who understand the intricacies of your restaurant's operations. This loss of institutional knowledge can lead to increased inefficiencies, errors, and potentially, decreased guest satisfaction.

While leadership in the restaurant business should prioritize employee well-being and satisfaction, a people-pleasing mentality can have significant negative consequences. It can lead to high turnover rates, which, in turn, cost the business money due to recruitment, training, and operational inefficiencies. Striking a balance between accommodating employees and maintaining accountability and efficiency is crucial for long-term success in the restaurant industry. 

Shifting your leadership style from being a people pleaser to someone who empowers their team can be transformative for your restaurant business. Here are three tips to help you make this shift:

Clarify Expectations:

• Begin by clearly defining your expectations for your team's performance and behavior.

• Establishing well-defined job roles, responsibilities, and performance metrics is essential. 

• Communicate these expectations openly and ensure that your team understands them.

Encourage Open Communication:

• Foster a culture of open and honest communication within your restaurant. 

• Encourage team members to express their ideas, concerns, and feedback without fear of retribution. 

• Regularly hold team meetings or one-on-one discussions to provide a platform for sharing thoughts and insights. 

• Actively listen to your employees, take their input seriously, and incorporate valuable feedback into decision-making processes. 

Provide Growth Opportunities:

• Empower your team by investing in their growth and development. 

• Offer opportunities for training, skill-building, and career advancement within your restaurant. 

• Recognize and reward outstanding performance through promotions or increased responsibilities. 

Making this shift from a people pleaser to an empowering leader can take time and effort, but the benefits for your restaurant and team morale are well worth it. It creates a more positive work environment, reduces turnover, and ultimately contributes to the overall success of your restaurant.

When you are ready to make this shift, give me a call.

P.S.

Whenever you are ready, here are several additional ways I provide daily support to hospitality leaders.

• If you are a restaurant owner looking for a strategic partner to scale your business, retain and develop your managers, let's connect. Email me at christinlmarvin@gmail.com or you can even text me at 719-494-6074.

(Rest assured, I won't attempt to sell you anything.)

• If you are a hospitality leader looking to level up and position yourself for career advancement without sacrificing work-life balance, let’s start a conversation. Email me at christinlmarvin@gmail.com

• Each week, I provide hospitality leaders with valuable tools and resources to shift from surviving to thriving by embracing mental fitness. Subscribe to my newsletter below to receive these helpful tips directly in your inbox.

Discovering Drugs and Alcohol in the Restaurant Business: My Recovery Journey

A 2 min read.

In honor of National Recovery Month, I felt compelled to recount my personal journey of encountering substance abuse within the hospitality industry. I feel as a society, it’s important to keep raising awareness about this issue, offering support to those in recovery, and extending a helping hand to those still battling addiction. Today, there are an abundance of incredible tools and resources available, more than ever before.

In 1999, upon my move to Colorado, I landed a job at Outback Steakhouse. This marked my debut in a front-of-house role and was truly the first job I thoroughly enjoyed. The money was impressive, the shifts passed swiftly, the food was delicious, and camaraderie was strong among all staff members. It was my first experience in an environment where teamwork thrived, where we'd gather at the bar for a shift drink, and then venture out together after work. This job even managed to coax out a bit of extroversion from this small-town, Midwest introvert.

During high school, I wasn't much of a drinker. My first real encounter with alcohol was at prom when I had a Zima with a jolly rancher at the bottom, which got me into some trouble. That pretty much summed up my partying experiences back then. However, when I started working at the bar, even though I was only 19, I began joining the staff for a post-shift drink at the end of the night. The Assistant General Manager or the closing bartender for the evening would kindly serve us drinks, and we would gather around, sharing laughter and stories until the bartender finished up. Afterward, those of us of legal age would head to the bar.

I can vividly recall the day when the General Manager/Proprietor of my Outback Steakhouse approached me while I was working on the back line. He paused, inquired about my age, and then erupted with a shout, "Quit drinking at my bar," when I admitted I was only 19. It marked the first time I had ever been reprimanded at work. The humiliation I felt in that moment was enough to make me immediately cease my drinking on the job.

(Speaking of bad managers, if you are looking for great managers to add to your team and tired of spending time and energy searching the internet, I highly recommend reaching out to Willow Tree Recruiting)

As my career in the restaurant industry advanced, my use of drugs and alcohol escalated, and I was far from being the only one. Throughout the years, I witnessed numerous front-of-house, heart-of-house, and managerial staff members losing their jobs due to on-the-job drinking. I've stumbled upon several employees snorting cocaine while at work or smoking pot in the alley during their breaks. There have even been occasions when I had to switch on the lights in the restaurant in the morning, only to discover employees passed out in the dining room. I’ve lost too many friends and co-workers due to overdose. 

Alcohol has consistently been ingrained in the restaurant culture I've been immersed in. Our manager meetings routinely took place in restaurants where we could freely order beers and margaritas. I've hosted extravagant gatherings featuring a generously stocked bar on numerous occasions, and our holiday parties often boasted bar tabs larger than our food bills. I've witnessed bosses and owners helping themselves to countless bottles of alcohol, even becoming heavily intoxicated during work-related events. The issue that loomed over us was our collective silence and failure to question these practices.

Research indicates that 19.1% of individuals within the hospitality industry have been found to use drugs in a given month, while 10% have reported grappling with alcohol addiction. Notably, both of these rates have experienced an upward trend during the pandemic. It's important to consider that these statistics only represent reported cases, leaving us to wonder about the vast number of individuals who may be silently struggling with these issues without speaking up.

When I committed to quitting alcohol, I had no idea the emotional whirlwind, anxiety, and overwhelming feelings that would accompany it. Every day became a lesson in how to navigate stressful situations. It dawned on me that I had likely been grappling with anxiety for an extended period without even recognizing it. To address this, I had to make adjustments to my diet, reduce my coffee intake, discover techniques for managing moments of panic through focused breathing, and incorporate short 10-minute walks around the block into my routine whenever I felt the urge to drink or needed to soothe my racing thoughts.

Quitting drinking stands as the most transformative choice I've ever made. It not only rescued my life but also played a pivotal role in restoring my self-assurance, expanding my perspective, fortifying my relationships, and emboldening me to embark on my entrepreneurial journey.

Let me be clear: I don't place blame on the restaurant industry for my struggles with drinking or exposure to drugs. However, the availability of these substances remains a pressing issue that needs attention. I hold deep love for this industry and wish to see it flourish.

Here’s are a few ways the hospitality industry can safeguard its workforce against addiction:

1. Equip leaders with the ability to identify signs of drug and alcohol use in the workplace.

   - Provide them with the necessary resources to offer assistance to employees.

2. Exercise Prudence in Employee Alcohol Consumption:

 - Be mindful of when and who consumes alcohol among staff.

3. Foster Employee Awareness:

   - Provide education to employees regarding the impacts of alcohol and drug use.

4. Promote Healthy Alternatives:

   - Encourage participation in alcohol-free activities such as pickleball, softball, and other outdoor activities.

By collectively raising awareness about substance abuse challenges within our industry and providing resources to all those within it, we have the power to save lives, safeguard our workforce, decrease turnover, alleviate burnout, and enhance both the guest and employee experience, ultimately improving overall quality of life.

If you or someone you know is suffering CHOW offers meetings, mental health assessments and mental health and substance abuse resources available to those in the hospitality industry.

P.S.

Whenever you are ready, here are several additional ways I provide daily support to hospitality leaders.

• On September 8th, 2023, I will be hosting a Hospitality Leadership Summit in Denver. Click here for more details HSL.

• If you are a restaurant owner looking for a strategic partner to scale your business, retain and develop your managers, let's connect. Email me at christinlmarvin@gmail.com or you can even text me at 719-494-6074.

(Rest assured, I won't attempt to sell you anything.)

• If you are a hospitality leader looking to level up and position yourself for career advancement without sacrificing work-life balance, let’s start a conversation. Email me at christinlmarvin@gmail.com

• Each week, I provide hospitality leaders with valuable tools and resources to shift from surviving to thriving by embracing mental fitness. Subscribe to my newsletter to receive these helpful tips directly in your inbox.

How I Created Success in My First Year as an Entrepreneur and How You Can Too

A 3 min read.

As I look back on the past year, a significant milestone emerges—the day Solutions by Christin went live, marking the beginning of my entrepreneurial journey. The decision to start my own company was fueled by a desire for ownership, a flexible schedule, and a determination to revolutionize the hospitality industry.

My goal was clear: to combat turnover, prevent burnout, and fortify leadership within the sector. Little did I anticipate the abundance of lessons, creativity, and empowerment that awaited me.

This year has been a whirlwind of challenges and victories, like drinking from a fire hose. It's undoubtedly the toughest yet most fulfilling journey I've embarked on, and I'm eager to share my journey over the last 365 days.

(Speaking of turnover, if anyone of you in the industry are short staffed on managers and tired of spending time and energy searching the internet, I highly recommend reaching out to Willow Tree Recruiting)

Prior to starting this journey of becoming an entrepreneur, I laid a foundation for myself. Here’s what that foundation looked like:

#1. Hired a Coach

I was certain that I wanted to switch careers, but I was completely unsure about what I wanted to do or even where to begin. I had this wild idea of actually fitting my job around my life instead of the other way round, which is what coach Ryan Farrell helped me do. This approach enabled me to establish clear boundaries right from the start and craft a distinct vision for the direction of my business.

#2. Defined my Purpose

Considering I was about to take a leap from a more-than-20-year career in hospitality, it was absolutely crucial for me to have a rock-solid grasp of my purpose. I needed to ensure that I was completely ready to embrace a new path—one that I would not only adore but could also passionately discuss for the next two decades or more.

#3. Set Goals

I set a goal for the number of clients I wanted to work with and created a monetary target. I then laid those numbers out over the course of a year and then scheduled 90 day check-ins with myself to monitor my progress.

#4. Designed my Routine

I've allotted myself a 3-hour block every morning before diving into work. This time is dedicated to walking my dogs, exercising, having breakfast, and either meditating or journaling. I also take the opportunity to plan out my day meticulously. By doing so, I establish a solid foundation for success and gain better control over my time and energy. Given that each day presents new experiences and a wealth of learning, this routine proves crucial to my journey.

#5. Built a Strategy

My strategy primarily revolved around tapping into my existing network while simultaneously building a new one in my newly adopted city of Tucson. You might wonder if I'm a glutton for punishment, setting up shop in a new city where I knew only my family. But let's be real, with my entire career rooted in the hospitality industry, hard work isn't something that intimidates me—it's what fires me up!

With my strategy in place, the next challenge was to discover the tools and resources I needed in order to achieve my goals. Here's how I did it:

#1. Daily Journaling

Every day, I made it a practice to jot down the outcomes of my coaching sessions, highlighting my successes and areas that needed improvement. Additionally, I documented the aspects of the day that brought me joy and those that I fell short on. This allowed me to maintain a clear record of my progress and actions.

#2. Constant Education

I searched for (and asked for many recommendations for) books and podcasts related to coaching, sales, marketing, and consulting. I made it a routine to absorb as much knowledge as possible while walking the dogs each day. The process was simple: I absorbed the information, put it into practice, reflected on its effectiveness, and then repeated the cycle.

#3. Building a Network of Experts in My Field

As time progressed, I began to experience the solitary nature of being an entrepreneur, especially as a first-timer working from home. Doubts arose regarding the efficiency of my time allocation, prompting me to seek out a community of seasoned professionals in my emerging field for guidance and camaraderie.

I delved into LinkedIn, connecting with every hospitality consultant and coach within my reach. I extended invitations for 30-minute conversations, aiming to understand their roles and contribute to their ventures. Remarkably, every single one of them accepted my request.

Engaging with these individuals provided a sense of connection, as their stories of beginnings closely mirrored my own. Amid my search, I crossed paths with Jim Taylor, an individual whose impact on me has been immeasurable. Jim is an outstanding human and possesses a remarkable business acumen. He plays an instrumental role in helping me refine my business strategy, shape my marketing plan, cultivate strategic business partnerships, and create different revenue streams to ensure the sustainability of my business. Jim, your support is invaluable—thank you!

Reflecting on the past year, I'm thrilled to share that I've nearly achieved my client goal. My confidence has surged to new heights, fueled by the progress I've made. A sustainable business plan is now firmly in place, and I'm relishing the incredible sense of empowerment and creativity that fills my days. It's safe to say I'm having an absolute blast!

I have so many wonderful people to thank for supporting me and cheering me on during this incredible next chapter of my life. Thank you for all the social media likes and comments, phone calls, text messages, newsletter subscribers and clients. The list is too long to name everyone but know my heart is full of gratitude for each and everyone of you. 

The one person I do have to thank is my husband, Tyler. Without his love, support and hard work picking up the financial slack that is the first year of starting a business, this would not be possible. Love you Tyler!

Christin

P.S.

Whenever you are ready, here are several additional ways I provide daily support to hospitality leaders.

• On September 8th, 2023, I will be hosting a Hospitality Leadership Summit in Denver. Click here for more details HSL.

• If you are a restaurant owner looking for a strategic partner to scale your business, retain and develop your managers, let's connect. Email me at christinlmarvin@gmail.com or you can even text me at 719-494-6074.

(Rest assured, I won't attempt to sell you anything.)

• If you are a hospitality leader looking to level up and position yourself for career advancement without sacrificing work-life balance, let’s start a conversation. Email me at christinlmarvin@gmail.com

• Each week, I provide hospitality leaders with valuable tools and resources to shift from surviving to thriving by embracing mental fitness. Subscribe to my newsletter to receive these helpful tips directly in your inbox.

How to Master the Art of Adding Hospitality to Your Hiring

A 4 min read.

In the ever changing world of the restaurant industry, where exceptional service is paramount, extending the principles of hospitality to your hiring process can make a significant difference in attracting and retaining top talent. 

Much like your restaurant strives to offer a welcoming and unforgettable dining experience, incorporating hospitality into your application process can attract top-tier talent, nurture positive candidate relationships, and expand your customer base. 

If you are frustrated with not attracting top talent to your restaurant, connect with Willow Tree Recruiting.

In this article, we'll take a detailed journey through the step-by-step process of talent attraction – from the inception of a job opening to the point of making a hiring decision or even promoting an individual to the role of a valued guest.

Crafting an Inviting Application Process

Take a moment to review your application process through the eyes of the applicant. Ensure that your application process reflects the warmth and charm of your restaurant. Here's how:

Share Your Story: Provide insights into the restaurant's history, values, and mission. Candidates who resonate with your narrative will feel a stronger connection.

Simplify the Process: Keep the application form concise and tailored to restaurant roles. Collect essential information without making the candidates burn too many calories.

Make the Application Fun: Candidates engage in an interview with you just as much as you're interviewing them. Encourage them to be authentic during the application process—this can serve as a unique marketing advantage, setting you apart from competitors.

Create a Plan for Walk-ins: Extend the same hospitality to your applicants as you would to your guests. Discover their needs, build a connection, and either conduct a brief interview right away or schedule a follow-up. Avoid simply redirecting them to your website.

Warm and Transparent Communication

Effective, timely, and courteous communication is crucial for applicants in the hospitality industry, much like it is for our guests. Extend these values to your hiring process:

Swift Acknowledgment: Respond with a prompt automated acknowledgment or sprinkle some personal charm on it. Extend the same level of care to applicants as you would to an email from a guest. Let candidates know what to expect if they are chosen for the next step or not.

Be Transparent: Outline the hiring process stages clearly. This transparency reduces uncertainty and anxiety for candidates. Put yourself in the candidate's shoes.

Personal Touch: Address candidates by their name in your communications just as you would a guest when they check in for a reservation. Use conversational language that reflects your restaurant's friendliness.

Thoughtful Interviewing Experience

Interviews in the restaurant industry should emulate the warm hospitality you provide to your guests. Follow these best practices:

Warm Welcome: Greet candidates warmly and introduce them to your team, just as you would greet guests at your restaurant. Offer them a beverage or a small treat upon arrival. 

Tour the Restaurant or Kitchen: This showcases your restaurant's commitment to transparency and invites them to be part of the team.

Interview with Managers and Peers: When a standout candidate emerges, arrange for them to meet the team responsible for their management and training. This not only fosters early connections but also enhances your team's interviewing skills in the process.

Communicate Next Steps: Nobody enjoys being left in the dark. Ensure you communicate with candidates about when they can anticipate hearing back about the position. If necessary, don't hesitate to provide an immediate response. It's about making efficient use of both your and their time.

Closing the Journey Graciously

The end of the hiring process should leave candidates with a positive impression, regardless of the outcome:

Respond to the No’s: Here's your opportunity to transform an applicant into a future guest. Express gratitude for their interest in becoming part of your team, inform them of the decision not to proceed with their hiring, yet extend an invitation to visit your restaurant as a guest in the future.

Keep the Door Open: If you believe a candidate might be a better fit for a different role within the company, share your perspective and outline the pathway for pursuing that position. By doing so, you're setting them on a path toward success in their future endeavors.

By integrating hospitality into your restaurant's hiring journey, you create a distinct advantage in attracting talent.

Just as guests leave your establishment with delightful memories, potential employees will remember the warmth, transparency, and respect they experienced during your hiring process and they will tell others about their experience.

A remarkable application experience not only brings in skilled professionals but also contributes to building a reputable employer brand within the competitive restaurant industry.

Christin

P.S.

Whenever you are ready, here are several additional ways I provide daily support to hospitality leaders.

• On September 8th, 2023, I will be hosting a Hospitality Leadership Summit in Denver. Click here for more details HSL.

• If you are a restaurant owner looking for a strategic partner to scale your business, retain and develop your managers, let's connect. Email me at christinlmarvin@gmail.com or you can even text me at 719-494-6074.

(Rest assured, I won't attempt to sell you anything.)

• If you are a hospitality leader looking to level up and position yourself for career advancement without sacrificing work-life balance, let’s start a conversation. Email me at christinlmarvin@gmail.com

• Each week, I provide hospitality leaders with valuable tools and resources to shift from surviving to thriving by embracing mental fitness. Subscribe to my newsletter to receive these helpful tips directly in your inbox.